Coffee Date? The Italian way of saying "We're Cool, Right?"

When I first moved to Trieste I thought that having coffee was an excuse for not working. You can hardly blame me. Be a fly on the wall of any office in Trieste, and here is what it looks like.

8:30 Empty.
8:45 Empty.
8:58 Empty.
8:59 First employees trickle in.
9:05 The rest of the team arrives. Coats stay on.
9:06 Turn on computer. Wait for the straggler to arrive.
9:07  Entire office leaves and walks to the nearest coffee outlet (machine, or, if lucky, a bar)
9:08-9:30 Empty.
9:31 The actual workday begins.

For an American, this seems strange. After all, we have our coffee at home. It is cheaper, and we can have more of it. That, and, We Know that you are supposed to WORK AT LEAST TWO HOURS to EARN another cup of coffee.

In Trieste, however, that is not how things roll.

You want to try something crazy and see two cultures collide?

I have a fun experiment for you then. Here is what you do:

Tell your Italian colleagues that you already had your coffee and that you will be skipping the morning trip to the coffee machine and see what happens.

Don't have the courage? No problem, because here is what will go down:

Someone will ask you if everything is OK and look at you with concern.
Another person will actually COME BACK and see if you have changed your mind.
Yet another will wonder what he or she did to deserve this snub.
Your office detractor will do a self-confirmation that you think you are better than everyone else.
If you wait a few minutes more, then, like clockwork, YOUR BOSS will stomp into your office and say:

WE ARE WAITING ON YOU! LET'S GO, STECKLEY!

And you will reluctantly get up and follow the other ducks. But, you will summon up your internal rebel to SHOW THEM and NOT ORDER COFFEE! Hmmph! So THAT is what you do.

And  guess what. NO ONE EVEN NOTICES. Because your Italian colleagues do not really care about what you drink at the coffee break. They just want you to be there.

Culture lesson!
You see, for Italians, this is a very important time where colleagues make sure that everyone is OKAY. It is the moment we find out who slept last night, who has a kid with a fever, who is not feeling well, who won the lottery. All of this information will help us understand how the workday will proceed.

To be sure, when we talk about the importance of coffee in Italy, we are really talking about the importance of RELATIONSHIP MAINTENANCE.

Less of a commitment than, say, Lunch, coffee is a cheap and quick way (always on your feet, by the way, only sit down for a coffee if you are contemplating marriage or reuniting with an old friend after a twenty-year absence) to reconnect and let the other person know that you are STILL COOL.

You can also use that 5-minute coffee time together to: strategize, thank, get to know, welcome, say goodbye, seal an important deal, or plan a boardroom coup.

The sky is the limit.

Never underestimate the power of coffee in Trieste.