Italian Taxes if American and Self-Employed

I don't know about you, but when I left the states in 2003 I expected to kiss my retirement goodbye. I had no idea that there was such thing as international pacts between countries and totalization agreements so that you can still retire even if you live in another country. I found out last year by accident and now I am doing my best to get my ducks in a row so that I, too, can someday enjoy my golden years...

First thing to know about living and working in Italy: If you work for an Italian company, you will pay your social security, which is called INPS, here in Italy. This means that for most people there is no issue. You should still do your American taxes each year but you will probably be exempted from having to pay anything there because you can't be taxed twice and you will have paid more here than you would have paid there anyway.

Everything changes, however, if you are self-employed. Once you open a VAT number (Partita IVA), you need to check out the table below. Here is the link.  

Note: This is an agreement between Italy and the US. Each country has its own agreement, so take a look at the Social Security website to get your info if you are living abroad but in another country. The rules are probably different.

What I want to highlight here is that if you are a US citizen, you should pay into the Social Security system in America, and NOT IN ITALY if you are self-employed. You need to get yourself a certificate of coverage BEFORE you start working as a self-employed person, otherwise you will have big problems, like I am having now after paying into the wrong system for 6 years. OUCH! If you do pay into the wrong system, like I did, you need to start paying into Social Security and send a copy of your tax documents to Social Security so that they can then issue your certificate of coverage and you can use that to ask INPS for reimbursement (you can only go back seven years).

If you are a dual citizen (American & Italian), you can choose to contribute to either the US or Italian system. I would encourage you to contribute to the American system for three reasons.

1. You only need to make 10 years of contributions as opposed to 20 years in Italy to ensure a minimum pension. You have to wait until retirement age to collect, of course, but everything you pay over the minimum is good news for you.

2. If you are married to an Italian or any other person who has never paid into the American Social Security system, they have a right to a pension of their own, which is calculated as 50% of your pension. This means that if I receive 1000 dollars per month, my husband has a right to a pension of 500 per month in addition to my pension.

3. The American system pays more, especially if you decide to work PAST retirement age. I know you are full of energy, so this may apply to you. If you are doing well and retiring early on the other hand, more power to you, that is my goal too!!

Another thing to consider. It is better to collect social security from one country or the other, not both. Once the countries know that you are collecting from another country (and they know because countries talk to each other), they reduce your benefits by up to 50% on both sides. Just so you know.

Let me know if you have any other issues about social security you want me to address here and I will do my best to find out how things work for you. Otherwise, I will update you on my progress of getting my situation in order.

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Summary Of Agreement Rules

The following table shows whether your work is covered under the U.S. or Italian Social Security system. If you are covered under U.S. Social Security, you and your employer (if you are an employee) must pay U.S. Social Security taxes. If you are covered under the Italian system, you and your employer (if you are an employee) must pay Italian Social Security taxes. "Certificate Of Coverage" section explains how to get a form from the country where you are covered that will prove you are exempt in the other country.

Your work status	Coverage and taxes
You are a U.S. National working in Italy:
For a U.S. employer	U.S.
For an Italian (or other non-U.S.) employer	Italy
As a self-employed person	U.S.
You are a U.S. national working in the U.S.:
For an Italian employer	U.S.
As a self-employed person	U.S.
You are an Italian national working in the U.S.:
For an Italian employer (or Italian-controlled business)	You may elect either U.S. or Italian coverage (see "Election Of Coverage" section)
For a U.S. (or other non-Italian) employer	U.S.
As a self-employed person and you are a resident of the United States	U.S
You are an Italian national working in Italy:
For Italian employer	Italy
For a U.S. employer or as a self-employed person and you are a resident of the United States	You may elect either U.S. or  Italian coverage (see "Election Of Coverage" section)
You are a dual U.S./Italian national working in Italy:
In employment or self-employment covered under both systems	You may elect either U.S. or  Italian coverage (see "Election Of Coverage" section)
You are a dual U.S./Italian national working in the U.S.:
In employment covered under both systems	You may elect either U.S. or  Italian coverage (see "Election Of Coverage" section)
As a self-employed person	U.S
You are a third country national regardless of the employer:
Working in the U.S.	U.S.
Working in Italy	Italy

Don't Forget Saint Nick

Just a quick reminder for those of you celebrating the holidays in Trieste. Saint Nick comes here. He's due on December 6. He doesn't just fill up your shoe with candies, either. He brings you REAL PRESENTS. They say this goes back to the Austrian tradition.

Kids are into Saint Nick, so make sure you leave your door open so he and his donkey can come in. He doesn't do chimneys even though he is skinny, so he could fit easily.

If you go to Viale XX September  you will see the Fiera di San Nicolò. That is another reminder for you not to forget St. Nick's day.

My sweetie hasn't forgotten. She has already written a letter saying that she wants a cat. A 3-YEAR-old cat. Not a 3-MONTH-old cat, mind you. It's a tall order, but Saint Nick is magic and he has two days to get it together. We'll see what the jolly old guy comes up with.

Also, don't go to school or to work on Friday. It's the day of the Immaculata.

Enjoy your short week!

Whatever happened to measure twice cut once??

In America everything has a process but we don't handle exceptions well.
In Italy there are only exceptions and no processes.

Everything you do here has to have an imprevisto.

Today's example is from the KITCHEN.

I bought a kitchen. It took months to arrive.

Installation day 1.

The day the workers came to install the kitchen, there were a couple of issues. First, the counter top had not been made yet because the proper stone was not available. That meant that cabinets could be installed but the appliances couldn't go in until the counter was in. That translated to two weeks which (of course) became three weeks with major appliances in my living room and no working kitchen.

Installation day 2

Finally, the workers came again to "finish the job." They noticed that the cabinet door for the dishwasher was just wrong and had to be replaced and the hardware for the cabinet that houses the fridge didn't attach to the fridge correctly. The front panel on the oven was damaged, and one whole side of the wooden table was completely unfinished as if it were going against a wall (which it is not). The cabinet with the extractor hood (I can't remember what we call those things) inside had a shelf with no hole in it to feed through the tube through.

Installation day 3

Fast forward three weeks, the guys come AGAIN. This time, they tried the oven but it didn't work (it blew out the electrical system for the house) and the counter was varnished but half of the counter is done in one style (rustic) and the other half is completely different (modern and flat).

Let's do the math. That's three visits and I still have no kitchen. I would like to say that this is an isolated event, but it's not.

Almost every job we had done in our house had such similar circumstances. In fact, we lived in our house for one month with only one electrical outlet for the entire house, even though the electrical work had actually been done for months. For some reason, those darn outlets just never got ordered. And then when they got here, half of them were wrong for one reason or another and other bits were missing. The holes cut in the ceiling for the lights were too big for the lights that arrived.

I mean, it's one imprevisto after another around here!

Please, give me a process!! Give me some quality control!!

But alas, it is not to be, because Life In Trieste offers bigger lessons in life:

You can't have what you want when you want it.

If it's worth having, it's worth waiting for.

My Jeans Smell like Fritto.

I smell like fried food. See, I went out for pizza last night (San Giacomo, Mancini. Quite good and Tuesdays you can get any pizza on the menu for 5 euros) with some old students and two of them got the craziest pizza ever.

It was:

Fried dough stuffed with provola cheese, topped with ricotta cheese, mortadella, and lemon (seriously). I had a little bite of the crust (with just fry and lemon) and it was like a trip to the moon on a marshmallow, I don't know how else to explain it.

When I got home my jeans stunk.
But I couldn't find any other pants.
That's because I am living in my new house and there is only one electrical outlet for the whole house and my flashlight didn't have enough coverage to find the clean clothes.
So smelly jeans it was.

I hate it when someone smells and it's ME.

The last time this happened was when I was feeling proud of myself for I don't know what and I decided to treat myself to lunch and I went to the kebab place not too far from work and had a falafel platter and decided to eat THERE. When I went to pick up little Sweetie, ever tactful NONNA was like "Woooo hooo! Do you ever smell!! What did you have for lunch? You smell like YOU were deep fried..."

Good Times!!

Teaching Teenagers Again

It has been a long time since I have taught teenagers during the actual school day. When I do it here in Trieste, it is normally a one-shot thing and I come in and leave like a rock star. Teaching every day in a school where kids are required to go and you are their TEACHER, is a completely different beast. I had forgotten about how many of them  come in and sit down all slumped over like they just woke up 5 minutes ago, or, worse, they are still sleeping. It doesn't matter what hour you have them, by the way.

Some glare at you in a daze but suddenly become animated the moment you start teaching. The problem is that this burst of energy has nothing to do with you. It is to begin a cross-room dialogue with another zombie who has just awoken from the dead.

At these moments, here is what goes through my mind.

1. What am I doing here?
2. Why don't they know how cool I am?
3. Can't they understand how lucky they are to have me?
4. Why can't I be famous (and somewhere else)?
5. Who are their parents?
6. Are those locks on the windows to keep them from throwing stuff or me from pushing them out?

But you can't lose your top. You have to just sit and wait. Like a dog you are trying to train when you give the command. Don't repeat, don't get angry. Wait. No rewards until that hinder is on the pavement.

However, it is as if my NOT speaking is just PERMISSION for them to apply makeup, fill up the silence by talking to friends, or throw small objects at each other (small, plastic, round, are the characteristics of choice).

It makes you think about what makes a person successful. I realize it is not brains. There are plenty of them in this classroom. Lots of smart kids. But that is not enough.

Knowing where you are. So that is my mantra. When things get out of hand, I just ask them.

WHERE ARE WE?

and they are trained to answer.

WE ARE AT SCHOOL.

and then I continue.

WHAT ARE WE DOING?

They answer, because it is automatic at this point.

WE ARE LEARNING ENGLISH.

It is a double whammy. One, it gets them back on track (for a few minutes). Two. If nothing else, they will know one sentence in the present simple and one sentance in the present continuous, and that is pretty good.

There is a Color Plan for Trieste

If you live in the downtown area or in any other area of Trieste that has historical significance, your home or building will be protected by the Soprintendenza Archeologia, Belle Arti e Paesaggio del Friuli Venezia Giulia. In short, if you want to change anything with the outside of your building, you are going to have to go through some serious planning and red tape. 

I probably told you we are doing work on a new house. Well, one of the things we are doing is changing the windows and the doors. The old ones are made of wood, so if we want to change the windows, no problem, as long as the new ones are made of wood. If you want to change the material (like PVC or whatever they're using these days), they have to look like wood. We checked out that possibility thinking that new wooden windows would be a lot more expensive. It turns out they weren't that much more and had a much longer guarantee than the fake wood PVC ones. Great. Go for those.

But then we wanted to change the shudders. Still wood, mind you, but a different style. Turns out, what we have are "Scuri alla Triestina," which have horizontal slats that you can open and close or aim up or down. We want to change to what we now know is called "Scuri alla Veneta," or solid blocks of wood with vertical lines that simply open or close. Who knew that shudders would be so important that you would need to create a "progetto" with an architect and take it to the correct office (and pay the expensive tax stamp) in order to give your pad an upgrade!

I have to say, it did give me a little insight into why so many of the buildings I see around are a bit decrepit-- let's just say that after all of the paperwork, I realized it wasn't just "La Crisi." Leaving things crappy is a hell of a lot cheaper and less stressful than what it takes to make even (what I would consider) a small change (for the better).

But enough of my grumbling. What I really want to tell you about is that I visited the office in San Dorligo where the first step in the process happens (we are a different municipality than Trieste, but all the paperwork ends up in Trieste and then in the Region eventually). What surprised me was that there actually is a reason for all of this careful consideration. The idea is that things should stay the way they always were to preserve the characteristics of what makes Trieste (or San Giuseppe or any other part of town) Trieste. There is a reason that Shudders are called Triestine shudders. For one thing, they were invented in Trieste (for a good example, check out the Ferdinandeo building) according to the needs of Triestine homes and the quirky weather (the BORA) you find here. In fact, lots of cities in Trieste have their own kinds of shudders (Padova, Vincenza, etc).

Besides that, if you want to paint your house, you can go to any paint store and ask for the color pantone for Trieste and they actually have it.

So the big surprise in all of this is that THERE ACTUALLY IS A MASTER PLAN. Good to know.

How Much Money Will I Make in Trieste

This is a question I get a lot from people who are thinking about moving to Trieste. The answer is, in Triestine fashion: BOH! It's difficult to know. While I can't give exact numbers, I can give you some things to think about as you plan whether or not you want to come, and what your life will be like once you get here.

As with all things in Trieste, the process is slow and arduous. Spoiler Alert! You should come here with a financial safety net. If you are desperate for money, then I would suggest you go to a city with a more dynamic work market or take a little time to pay off your debts and simplify your life.

Other things to keep in mind.

1. There is no pre-existing job for you here. You have to create it.

2. If you don't speak Italian you will not go very far. This is a good reason to have a safety net-- it will give you time to learn the language enough to be able to work.

3. It will be nearly impossible for you to find a job BEFORE you actually come here. This is hard for anglo-saxons to get, but the human connection is important here. Your CV isn't enough.

4. If you are a woman,  you are the most difficult to employ unless you are in your early 20s (I have written a lot about this in the past. I will have to dig up the links).

5. If you are over 40, idem.

6. Pay attention to the kind of visa you are using to stay in Italy. That will also determine whether or not you can work legally.

7. Could you live on HALF the salary you currently make? Try it for a couple of months.

8. If your identity is deeply linked to your Career, you will probably be disappointed here.

I know this sounds depressing, but finding your niche here takes a while. Some people give up before finding it. If you are patient and can find lots of other reasons to be happy, then you will love it here.

What the Kids are Listening To These Days

I teach teenagers. This week I asked them what they were listening to and they played this catchy little ditty for me. It was fascinating to see the kids light up when they heard it (and ALL of them knew ALL of the words). They seemed excited that I wanted to hear it and were showing off for me (mouths with braces, chomping gum while they sing, cigarettes behind ears, backpacks zipping because it's the last hour and they are ready to race out but they want to hear the whole thing).

The comments on the youtube page say things like "7 million views? I think 1 million are mine" and "If my mom hears me playing this song one more time she is going to slam my face into the asdlkfjaopiejtroiahsg."

There are subtitles so you can practice singing. There are a few bad words and references to drugs, but nothing you can't handle...

Enjoy!

Aria Bona in Arrivo!

Yeah, it's raining in Trieste! Time to open those windows and secure the damn things so the outside window doesn't hit the inside window and break it and crash down onto the sidewalk and it's your fault!

Wind to follow. Whooopeeee!

Found the pants. The shoes: AWOL. Hope nobody notices (but we are in Italy so everyone will but they won't judge me because they will just group me up with the Germans and reason I just don't know any better).

So that's that. Happy Friday!

It's Almost September and I can't find my Pants

Living in Italy means embracing August. August is not for working. It is for going to the beach, drinking wine, eating fried food at sagras and waiting in long lines to come and go on your big road trip to somewhere just a bit nicer than where you actually are.

Joy as an expat comes when you do as the Italians do and trade in your shoes for flip-flops (infra-ditto), pack a cold lunch and head to the beach from dawn til dusk.

But tomorrow is September 1st and I have to go do "real" work (definition of real work: go to an office where you can't wear shorts or flip-flops).

Here is the rub... I can't find my shoes OR my pants.

See, I am living out of a suitcase and when I packed it 1) I was sure we would be in the new house at the beginning of August and 2) it was hot and who wants to think about long pants or closed shoes when it's hot?

I think I can rustle something up. Let's just hope the temperature change that is in the forecast doesn't require SOCKS, because then I will seriously be in a pickle.

Wish me luck.

Can we PLEASE Unplug our Children?

I know I am not the only one who has noticed that our kids have become sassy, grumpy, and dissatisfied in general, and this has a positive correlation with the amount of time they spend watching t.v., playing with parents' phones, ipads, playstations, etc.

It's time we admit that screens are addictive and counter-productive to becoming the happy, social creatures we humans are meant to be. This is especially so for our kids. I can't tell you how many times this summer I witnessed kids sitting together at tables, in parks, at peoples' houses. They are playing on their devices but not talking to each other.

In fun situations, they are not having fun because they are not getting their technology fix. Instead, they are giving their parents the stink eye and pouting. They know exactly how to get our attention, too. Some scream until we get embarrassed and give in, others cry and have a fit, still others just fume and silently hate us.

And then we give in. Why is it so hard for us to stick to our instinct (which clearly states that the phone or ipad is getting in the way of normal behavior). Do we really fear our children's wrath so much? Is this how we think we are earning their love?

Yes, it's our fault, parents. We can't say no. It is easier to say yes. We want to talk to our friends, we can't bear the thought of our little sweeties getting bored, we think we have to keep them entertained at all times and at all costs. We feel guilty for a million other things, and we want our children to love us.

But this, my friends, is not how we communicate love. We have to stop equating giving kids everything they want with love and acceptance. We have to be a strong point of reference that protects our children from things we know are harmful. Our kids love us more when we create security and protect them. We are not the same. Just because we look at our phones all the time does not mean that our kids have the right to do the same. (We should also cut down, by the way).

It's back to school time and the teacher in me is coming out to give orders. It's time for me to give you permission to do what your kids will hate, but will give you inner peace sometime in the future because you know you are doing the right thing. What we need to do is create a NEW CULTURE in the house.

It's time to snuff out the bad habit of not allowing our kids to get bored (which leads to creativity and a simpler, healthier kind of playing and happiness).

If your kids have not gone back to school yet, you can already start. Get into the habit of being a mean mom or dad (and reap the benefits). Here is how.

Create some new rules.
1. No T.V. or electronic devices during the week.

At my house, we parents also don't watch t.v. during the week, which we think takes away valuable time from talking, reading, and doing other things together. The first week is hard. The second week is heavenly.

2. Teach kids what time means the tough way.

Saturdays became ALL ABOUT T.V. when we stopped watching during the week, so I added another rule. For every hour of t.v. (or tech) you have to complete a nature walk with your mother (I can use the exercise) before the weekend is through. When Sweetie watched 2.5 hours of t.v. we ended up doing a 9-mile walk the same day. You can bet her hunger for t.v. cooled after that!

3. Just say NO!

A kid not getting their way in the short term is painful for them and for you. It is counter-intuitive but when  you say no to harmful habits and behaviors and create positive routines as a result your children will love you MORE, not less!

Your kid may talk like an adult at times, but she is not. She is a kid. She does not get to make all of the decisions. She can make some of them. Also, kids automatically say no to what they are not familiar with. If you want to try a new experience that you know your child will love, make the decision in her best interest. Do not get her permission first!

4. Let them get bored.

When we were little, our parents sent us outside to play when we drove them nuts. Sometimes they locked  us out to make sure we stayed out there. We don't do that to kids nowadays, but the idea is clear. You as a parent are not responsible for making sure your kid is entertained at all times. If you keep the t.v. off and do something else (like make dinner or clean out your sock drawer), chances are your kid will do something amazingly adorable (like help you make dinner or clean out her sock drawer or make you a beautiful piece of art or write in her diary). The key is she has to get to the point of boredom.

My friend Monica loves to tell kids that in French (and in Italian) Being bored is a reflexive verb, as in "I bore myself" Je m'ennuie, Mi annoio. So, happily point out (when the complaining begins) that boring yourself is a choice and she has all the tools to fix it.

A quick reminder:

Doing the right thing takes courage. You will feel pressure not only from your children and other family members but you quickly see that other parents do not share your courage. This will make you feel terrible as you go out for dinner with another couple and their child who is happily playing on mom's phone while yours is looking at you with that pleading look of desperation. Yes, these moments are hard, but, if you stick to your guns, it will be your child who comes to you later to say.

"Wow, were those kids boring. They were on their phones the whole time!"

Good luck and STAY COURAGEOUS, parents! We are in this together.

Three Sagras in One Weekend

Sagra della Sardella -- Trieste

Saturday night we went to the Sagra della Sardella to see Lorenzo Pilat do his last gig of the summer. If you haven't seen him yet, try to catch him while you can. Everyone knows that Triestini have a pact with the devil as far as longevity, but Pilat is 79 and still playing his one-man show and singing everyone's favorites: Tram d'Opcina, Finanziere, etc. I don't know how long he can keep it up...

The Sagra della Sardella has changed locations over the years. It started out having something to do with actual water (Sardella is a fish after all) but it didn't last on the Rive for long. When I went for the first time a few years ago it was already in the outskirts of town at Campanelle. Now it is held on the Horse track (Ippodromo), which is an odd place for a Sagra, but it's not a bad location after all. There is lots of space and parking is easier. The food is good and the prices are fair. The wine isn't great, but you get what you pay for.

Festa del Pescatore -- Santa Croce

It was a lazy Sunday and we weren't sure what to do after lunch. In the end we went to Santa Croce to a mini-sagra celebrating its fishing heritage. Santa Croce was the only fishing village in the Carso (it looks down over the Filtri, if you like to go to the beach in the less crowded areas). They had activities for kids and a tug of war competition between folks from the inland part of the village and those looking over the sea. I am not sure who won because I was back in the giardinetto eating and drinking. There was a nice selection of fried seafood and a surprising plate with a grilled tuna steak, boiled potatoes and veggies. I found a veggie option: Capuzzi and Fasoi (my favorite). They also had fried zucchini and eggplant. The food was yummy and not too expensive and the wine was local.

Sagra di Prosecco -- Prosecco

On the way home we stopped at the Sagra in Prosecco where some of the guys working on my house were camping out and working from Friday- Sunday night slinging Civapcici by day and partying by night. I wasn't sure what they had to do with Prosecco because normally the people who live in the village that is holding the Sagra organize the weekend of events with proceeds going to their cultural association. Churches also hold Sagras.

This sagra was different, however. When we got there we saw that it was organized by the TLT or the Triestine Independence Movement.  So there was lots of talk of the good old days when it was the Free Territory of Trieste. The food was typical Sagra food: Meat and french fries, Palacinke (crepes), and beer and wine.

The highlight of the Prosecco sagra was music in Triestine and a set by DJ Zippo, who basically holds a sagra-wide aerobics class. Everyone gets into it and does the synchronised dances of the summer. Super fun.

We Heart the Riposino in the Summer

I don't know about you but this Summer thing is getting out of hand. I feel like every day I wake up saying "now TODAY I am REALLY going to be good. No spritzes, no staying up late..." and then, BAM, some kind of special occasion comes up and one spritz leads to another and blah blah blah.

That's Trieste in the summer (and winter, too, come to think of it). Friends visiting, last night in Trieste, gotta celebrate and STARE INSIEME...

So, it's a good moment to remind you of the importance of another Triestino summer classic, The RISPOSINO. It's that little rest you take after lunch because you can because you are not quite back on your full winter schedule or you still have some vacation days left or it's your day off. No, don't call it a siesta. We are in Italy, remember, and that word is Spanish. No code switching.

Sleep during the day is beautiful. I just got up from my little nap and feel like I have a second chance at life. I hope you got one in, too!

Can I ask you something??

Why isn't the statue of Giuseppe Verdi in Piazza Verdi? I mean, it's just so confusing!! For years, when I wanted to meet up with people I would have conversations that went something like this:

Let's meet up where Verdi is. 

Where? Piazza Verdi? 

No. Wait? Which one is that? The one by Teatro Verdi or the one where Verdi is sitting down, because they are both Piazzas but I can't remember what they are called. 

Verdi VERDI is in Piazza San Giovanni and Piazza Verdi is that other one behind that big yellow building that has no stores in it because the rent is so high. 

Yeah, they sell studio apartments in that place for like half a million euros. Does anyone live there? It looks like a ghost building to me. 

Where are we meeting again? 

Piazza Goldoni. 

Is that the one with the giant glass cd tower across the street next to the fountain by cremcaffè?..

Delfino Verde - Take the Boat to the Beach from Downtown

If you're looking for a cheap thrill before real life starts again in September, especially for kids, the Delfino Verde is a good option. It's run by a private company but has contracts with Trieste Trasporti, the local bus company, and APT, the bus company that takes you further afield (like to the Airport).

The Delfino has three lines departing from Molo dei Bersaglieri in downtown Trieste.

1. Muggia (Trieste Trasporti)
2. Barcola/Grignano/Sistiana (Trieste Trasporti)
3. Grado  (APT)

This summer I decided to get a 10-ride pass so that Eva and I could have five trips to Muggia, which is a great place for a walk and some ice cream, or to go swimming and lay on the beach (we walk about 10 minutes and choose a different place each time. Some beaches are free and others you pay for but have more services (like bathrooms and restaurants). While the view from the Muggia side is not as pretty as Barcola or other beaches on the Trieste side, kids love boat rides and a trip to Muggia is easy peasy. The historic center is also quite cute and feels like mini Venice. I don't have a car, and the busses to Barcola are always super packed in the summer, as are the beaches in that direction, so Muggia worked out for us this year.

The down side is that kids pay (on the city bus kids are free up to age 10, at least in 2017) and if you want to ride together you have to have two tickets. This means I had to buy two ten-trip passes, which cost 13.50*2. I thought that was dumb, but, then again, I just couldn't get myself to pay 7.90 each for one round trip. We have only gone twice so far, but that's okay. The Muggia line runs all year, so we will eventually get those rides in.

Another cheap option is to take the Delfino Verde in one direction and then take the city bus back. We did that both times (I have a yearly bus pass and Eva rides free). Bus 20 leaves from the Bus station in Muggia and takes you all the way downtown to the station in Trieste. Eva got her boating fix two days in a row and we still have 8 more chances to go.

As an aside, and because I am talking about Bus lines this week, Bus 20 also stops at the Free Time shopping mall and that is the one that has Decathlon, for cheap sporting goods. Just so you know. Keep Bus 20 in mind when Carneval time comes again. Muggia does Carneval in spectacular fashion and who wants to drive anyway?

Watch Where you Step

It is FIG season, people!! The worst thing to hit the bottoms of your sandals since you know what! The telltale signs are the same, but figs don't smell bad.

Beware when walking on grass!!

Good Times in Your 40s

Today's bus sensations will give you the best sea views possible and a cultural experience, all for the price of a bus ticket.

Behold as we discuss the magic of bus numbers 42, 44, and 46.

They all start in Piazza Oberdan (if your back is to that statue in the middle and you are looking at the starting point of the Tram d'Opcina, the bus stop is to your left) and finish in Opicina (42), Villaggio del Pescatore (44) and Samatorza (46).

The advantage of these busses is that they take you up to the Carso, which is the upper part of Trieste that is full of great places to go walking, enjoy nature, and drink wine. I like them because you get a good dose of the international flavor of Trieste. You will hear people speaking Slovene (the Carso is largely Slovene speaking), Italian, Triestino, English, German, and even Urdu and Turkish.

All three busses go up to Prosecco (don't confuse this Prosecco with the one that makes sparkling wine), which is the first stop in the Carso (actually Contovello is a few meters before but let's not get too technical) so there is less of a wait. It is a 25-minute ride. My advice: get on the bus and sit down 10 minutes before departure, as these fill up fast and standing up can be challenging while the bus makes its ascent. Sit on the left side if you are going up and on the right side if you are going down. If you can't get a seat, go to the middle and wrangle your way in to the spot where wheelchairs go (rarely).

Hang on for dear life.

Life with Pets in Trieste

For those of you who do not know, Luna, my sweet yellow lab, is no longer with us. She had a wonderful and full life of 13 years and having a dog in Trieste was an amazing experience that I hope to repeat soon.

Here is why:

1. You can take your dog just about everywhere in Trieste, even into stores and restaurants. Train your little yipper to be respectful in public places and you will not believe how many people will bring her a bowl of water even without your asking for it.

2. It's a great way to make friends. We met wonderful couples with kids because they asked us to pet our Luna and we planned follow-up play dates  osmiza outings with them.

3. There are opportunities to do meaningful things with your dog here. We did both Salvataggio in Acqua and Pet Therapy with Luna. All in all she did 6 years of doggy training that resulted in a super sweet and obedient dog, but also super memories of doing extraordinary things with Luna, like the times we did doggy Lifeguard demos in front of Piazza Unita, where you are normally not allowed in the water.

4. If you have a baby at Burlo in Trieste and you tell them you have a dog, they will give you your baby's first blanket to take home to the dog so that she recognizes the new member of the family the moment she comes home from the hospital. Seriously, when we brought Eva home, Luna looked up, and went back to sleep (on the new baby's blanket, which became her doggy bed for the winter months of the next several years).

5. Dogs can go swimming in the sea here in specific places and times (early morning and evening are best recommended).

6. The bike path in Trieste is so beautiful it is a shame not to share it with a dog, don't you think?

7. Vets are wonderful people and even do house calls in extreme cases. Write to me in private for my favorites.

Some things to know about having pets in Trieste.

You need to register your pet via micro-chip when that pet becomes yours and you also need to notify the Comune when your animal dies. The vet will give you a certificate of death that you bring with you. The hours are strange (9-11am weekdays and 4-6pm on Mondays and Wednesdays I think) so check the website first.

But let's not dwell on death, let's talk about LIFE, which is super mega awesome when you have beasts in your life.

Rest In Peace.
Luna Steckley Meng
August 3, 2004- August 1, 2017

Meet the 25 and the 41- Our Featured Busses of the Day!

Those of us who rely on our feet and Trieste Trasporti know the city as well as any pizza delivery person but we would be terrible pizza delivery people because it would take us forever to get your pizza to you, even if we can see the exact bus stop in our mind's eye.

That being said, in spite of 14 odd years of bus travel, I am still adding new bus lines to my reportoire.

Today I would like to talk to you about my two new faves, the 25 bus and the 41.

This is where you can get information on the different busses. The site is not translated into English (whaaa?) so this is the most exact page with the areas the different numbers go. If you click on the blue writing, you will get the bus schedule for that particular line.

The 25. Comes frequently.

This one goes from Piazza della Borsa to Cattinara hospital and back. It is an interesting bus because it doesn't start from the Station like most of the busses in Trieste, so it allows you to get closer to places like Piazza Unità without that extra 10-minute schlep. I am currently using it to avoid walking up a monstrous hill that takes me to Chiadino, where I am staying until my house is done getting did. Chiadino has really breathtaking views of Trieste and... that's about it. There are some super villas and mega beautiful places that feel like they are in the middle of the country even though you are about a 15 minute walk from the city (going down) and a quick bus ride up (take the 25 at the Portici, which is the corner of Via Battisti and Via Carducci, if you want). The 25 also takes you up Via Marchesetti if you want a faster trip down from MIB to the city or if your kid goes to school near Cattinara.

The 41. Comes almost never. 

This bus defies gravity. It starts at the Station and takes you as far as Bagnoli (Val Rosandra), which is arguably the prettiest part of town if you don't like towns. The first puzzle is why the bus is so small, until you realize how few people are crazy enough to live where it goes and/or not have a car if they do. Especially fun is the near vertical SALITA that starts at Domio and takes you up to Log and San Giuseppe and continues up to Moccò etc. You will have new respect for Triestine bus drivers as they stare death in the face at least 5 times on that stretch of what SHOULD be a one-way street.

Hope this helps! Happy Bus Riding!

A Glossary of Terms for Buying and Selling Property in Trieste

I have been busy lately. Last week I sold my apartment, and am currently renovating a house that we bought in foreclosure late last year. I moved out of my apartment in the meantime, and am now living in another place temporarily until my new house is ready to move into. Welcome to Italy, people-- where Life Happens in sloooooooowwwwww moooootttttiiiiioooooonnnnn!

Since it is fresh in my mind, I thought I would put together a quick run-down of what selling your house (and thus buying) often looks like. First, I should warn you, if you are asking for a mortgage from a bank, it is going to take 2-3 months to get the okay (or the thumbs down). If you know you are looking for something, it makes sense to go to the Bank first and get an idea what you can afford and get a preliminary ok. It doesn't change things a whole lot, but at least it forces you to get your paperwork together ahead of time and that will save you headaches later.

Here are the people involved in the hullaballoo.

1. L'Aquirente: This is the Buyer
2. Il Proprietario: The Owner who is also...
3. Il Venditore, The Seller
4. The Perito: This is the person who comes to your house at the request of the Bank (it costs about 300 euros. Normally banks won't send this person unless they are pretty sure they will give you the money, although I may be wrong). They need to put a value on your house for that Lien (ipoteca), which is the guarantee for your mortgage. He or she will also check to make sure your place looks like the official drawings and that you haven't snuck in any extra rooms or bathrooms without going through the necessary paperwork (lavori abusivi). The values they come up with can vary greatly depending on who is asking them to do the work. For example, when I was buying our new house, the court gave the house a value of about 30.000 euros more than the Perito the bank hired to give us a mortgage on it. It is not an exact science.
4. The Geometra: they are often the same as the Perito. They deal with plans for your house, values, that kind of thing. They work along with architects and can be specialized in different aspects of building.
5. The Notaio: Not a notary public, but more like a lawyer who is in charge of overseeing the sale of the property. They are paid a percentage of selling price of the house. They oversee the Preliminario contract (an agency can also do this) where there is a downpayment (una caparra) and the definitivo (the closing).
6. The Banca: the Bank
7. The Catasto: The Land registry. This is where you can ask for the Visura Catastale that gives you more information on the property you are interested in buying or selling. Only the owner can ask for it (maybe a perito or a notary can do it too). You are expected to show it to anyone who may be interested in buying your place, and you can ask for it if you are buying). 
8. The Tavolare: This is like the Catasto but seems to only exist in Trieste, or perhaps also in other ex-Hapsburg areas. Everything that gets registered with the Catasto also needs to be registered here.
9. Agenzia Immobiliare. If there is an agency involved, get ready to pay an astonishing 4% more if you are buying and 1-2% if you are selling. 

You can also sell da PRIVATO (without an agency) by listing your place yourself on a site like subito.it. You will have to answer the calls and inquiries and show your place on your own, but you can save a nice chunk of change. Beware, most of the people who call you will actually be agencies trying to talk you into listing with them.

I have never used an agency, so I know the process can be done without one. Also, there are less people selling without agencies so you get more visibility when people google and add  VENDE DA PRIVATO.

When coming up with a price, check the real estate websites to see what the market looks like for a place like yours in a neighborhood like yours in YOUR CITY. We sold our place for less than what we paid at the height of the bubble 13 years ago, but that was fine, since we also bought super low. It all comes out in the wash! If you are not getting any bites, that is an indication that your price is too high. And why is that? Decide what is more important: getting a few euros more (wait and be patient), or getting the money in the bank (lower and get rid of it!)

People like to buy houses that don't need much work, so if you want to sell fast, I hope you have a decent kitchen and the bathroom has been updated in the last 20 years (most in Trieste haven't been). This is also true for rentals. Update that bathroom, people!

Another consideration is to make sure you do work on your place using the correct procedures. Anything you do that is not above board will come back to haunt you later. Make sure your heating and electrical systems are A NORMA (up to code).

If you are doing work on your house, remember to always ask your accountant what you can get tax write offs on (this goes for everyone, not just freelancers). In my experience, workers don't like to do invoices when they can work in nero (under the table) but the savings for you can add up so let them know from the moment you ask for an estimate that you would like an invoice (lavoro con fattura).

Right now, for example, you can get 65% back over ten years (which is a long time, but you will never get a 65% discount any other way) on anything you spend for increasing energy efficiency in your home, and 50% for most other renovations. If you do this, make sure you get detailed information on how to make the payments and what to write on the money transfers and invoices (no cash allowed in these cases).

People have been very helpful in making sure we get things done right. They will for you, too, but you have to ask.

Hope this helps. Happy Home Hunting!

I love Jan Morris!

If you know anything about Trieste, it's probably because you read something by Jan Morris. She was a soldier during the days of the military government here after WWII. That was when she was a he. She was transgender before transgender was cool.

I mention it because I just finished her book, Conundrum, where she talks about her life and the process of going through a sex change. It is beautifully written. I especially enjoyed the parts where she talks about the difference in how people treated her before and after.

Here is my favorite excerpt (p. 131 if you borrow the copy we have in our library)

"It is hard for me now to remember what everyday life was like as a man- unequivocally as a man, I mean, before my change began at all. It amuses me to consider, for instance, when I am taken out to lunch by one of my more urbane men friends, that not so many years ago that fulsome waiter would have treated me as he is treating him. Then he would have greeted me with respectful seriousness. Now he unfolds my napkin with a playful flourish, as if to humour me. Then he would have taken my order with grave concern, now he expects me to say something frivolous (and I do). Then he would have pretended, at least, to respect my knowledge of wines, now I am not even consulted. Then he would have addressed me as a superior, now he seems to think of me (for he is a cheerful man) as an accomplice. I am treated of course with the conventional deference that a woman expects, the moving of tables, the wrapping of coats, the opening of doors: but I know that it is really deference of a lesser kind, and that the man behind me is the guest that counts.

But it soon all came to feel only natural, so powerful are the effects of custom and environment. Late as I came in life to womanhood 'a late developer', as somebody said of me- the subtle subjection of women was catching up on me, and I was adjusting to it in just the way women have adjusted down the generations."

By the way, this book was first published in 1974.

I liked her book on Trieste, Trieste and the Meaning of Nowhere. I also enjoyed The Venetian Empire.

Now I am eager to read some of her earlier work before the change. So fascinating.

Happy Reading this summer!
 

Hark! The Rondini are Here!

I never noticed the little buggers before, but it seems to be all that anyone is talking about this year. The sweet darling RONDINI are back. I had to look them up for a word in English, and I got this spectacularly boring name: Barn Swallows. They are these tiny little birds that look like bats when they are in flight. If they make a nest on your house you have been CHOSEN and you should feel honored. They come back year after year and nest in the same place so don't be all filling up that hole in your outside wall anytime soon!

We have a nest in a hole in my house that we haven't moved into yet because we are renovating. It is a man- made hole that goes all the way through the external wall that I am guessing was for inserting a metal tube and extending it to the roof for expelling smoke from a pellet heater. In the early evening there are three little babies in there. They peek their heads out to say hello.

Beware, once you notice the Rondini, you cannot stop noticing them. Now I see them everywhere, after years of not even knowing they existed. When did I start looking up?

They are pretty little things. Their legs are short so they stay up high and fly off their perches and glide from there.

World Championships for Offshore Sailing in Trieste this Week!

I don't know if you've heard the buzz, but ORC Worlds Trieste 2017 is taking place in Porto San Rocco all this week until July 8. There are 118 boats participating with crews from 19 countries. The Long regatta is underway now. It started yesterday at 2pm from Piazza Unità in Trieste, went towards Sistiana, then turned back around and down the coast of Istria. The biggest boats have a whopping 120 miles to complete. The first finishers should be coming back this afternoon, for the others it's going to be a long night...

The regattas continue until July 8 and  there is something special going on every day. Check out the website here.  You can also follow them on Facebook, sometimes there is livestreaming if you want to watch from afar!

Working with Italians and Put the Pig in the Bag are Out!

Yes, finally, the books that Klementina Koren and I wrote and self-published are available on Amazon. The one in English is called Working with Italians and it is a set of lessons learned and diary-type gossip about the work we have done helping Italian companies communicate abroad. The Italian book is called Put the Pig in the Bag.  My brother, Ed Steckley, a hot-shot artist in New York, was kind enough to do the covers.

Spoiler alert, we don't talk much smack about the Italians (except the ones who aren't good at making decisions, homophobes, and a couple of scoundrels). We do go into some detail about cultural differences and what makes the Italians, and the Americans, tick. It is a story with two voices:  mine and Klementina's.

This is the link for the English version called Working with Italians.

This is the Italian version , Put the Pig in the Bag, and yes, you have to wait until the end to understand why.

Like any good story, there are always two sides. Klementina Koren published the Italian version and translated my words into Italian, I did the English version and translated her words into English. How's that for teamwork?!

For a complete picture, I suggest you read both, of course.

Still Making Housecalls!

Perhaps only Americans will truly appreciate what happened here a few weeks ago (that I forgot to blog about). It was like a scene out of Little House on the Prairie! The Italians may not be so surprised, but I mention it because it is one of the wonderful things about the Italian Healthcare system. Mostly, people complain about the state of healthcare here, but that is understandable because it has always been available for next to nothing. Things are changing (as in you have to pay for things now, but not everything and when you do it costs about the same as what you would pay with insurance on the day of the visit in the States).

One night about a month ago, my husband had terrible stomach cramps after dinner. They continued until he went to bed. Poor guy, he was literally moaning in pain from his side of the bed. I told him to go to the bathroom, the only place where problems like these get solved. So that is where he spent most of the night.

He was miserable and erupting at both ends. Finally he said he couldn't take it anymore. He was scared it would never end. He decided to call the hospital. He told them his condition was not life threatening but he didn't know what else to do.

They told him to call the Guardia Medica. You do that and within a few minutes the doctor calls you back. He asked a series of questions and when he understood the problem he asked if husband could come to his office. Husband said he was not able to drive (for fear of another acopalypse) and besides that, I couldn't take him because our young daughter was sleeping.

Ok, he said.

Then HE came to OUR HOUSE. Yes, at 5:00 am this kind man came to our humble apartment and gave my husband a big fat shot in the behind and left him a pack of immodium.

I felt so grateful and husband finally got some sleep. He snoozed like a baby until noon.

Two Seasons in Trieste

Back in Ole Wisconsin we used to say there were two seasons: WINTER and CONSTRUCTION.

I believe that in Trieste there are also two seasons: WINTER and STINKY FOLKS ON THE BUS.

It's that time of year again!! Enjoy the sun!

Monday has Practically Disappeared!!

It's one festivity after another this month! Even next Monday we're off! Woo hoo! This week it was the Liberation, next week it's May Day. The week before it was Easter Monday.

Europe rocks!

Living the Elementary Green Dream!

I have to say I am quite impressed with what kids learn in school in Trieste from an early age. Earth day is not really a THING here like it is in the States, but there is an emphasis on living the green life every day.

My sweetie is in first grade and here is how she's learning to live the green dream.

1. Kids wear a smock over their clothes.

In her school the girls and the boys wear the same color: dark blue. The kids know that when they put them on they are in SCHOOL and not at Home, or at Grandma's house, and they act accordingly. On a green level, they are protecting their clothes and therefore less washing needs to go on at home (and thank God for that, as most of us here have no dryer, also green, even if I still miss having one sometimes).

2. Kids bring slippers to school.

They have their outside shoes and their inside shoes. This keeps their classrooms and common areas cleaner, therefore less need for heavy-duty harsh chemicals.

3. Kids grow a garden with their teachers.

They have a little plot of land about a 5 minute walking distance from their school. They plant all kinds of goodies and get to see them grow. They also see where their food comes from and have the opportunity to see a project through its entire cycle. This week they are beginning their "Fruits and Vegetables" project. There is a dietician coming to meet with parents and explain how parents can support it at home. For now, we got a note reminding us to have lots of fruits and veggies on hand and talk about them with our kids.

4. Kids leave a cloth napkin at school.

They use it all week for their snack and lunch and then bring it home for washing on weekends.

5. Kids leave a hand towel at school.

They use it to dry their hands after they wash them. They each have their own hook in the bathroom. When the weekend comes we do a load with the smock, the napkin, and the towel so we are ready to send them with her again on Monday.

6. The kids leave their own water bottle at school.

They fill up their bottles as they need them. Plastic disposable bottles are discouraged.

Yes, this is public school, but it's not just her school. I think most of the elementary schools in Trieste have similar routines.

These green details may be small gestures, but put them together and you create routines that can last a lifetime and make a real difference. Well done, School!

They do House Calls Here

The other night Sweetie started feeling nasty a couple of hours after dinner. Cramps, general nastiness. He declared he was going to bed without further ado. Unlike him.

I decided to stay up and watch some netflix when I heard a moan from the other room. I muted the tv and heard it again. It was Sweetie.

I ask him what's going on. He says he's cold, that his stomach is killing him. I tell him to go to the bathroom (where these problems have some chance of getting resolved). He tells me he doesn't think he can make it.

Strange.

Then it all begins: the noises and gurgles that make you wonder if you should stay or leave him in peace. You can imagine.

So this goes on and on and on for some time.

Then he feels better.

Then it starts again.

And again.

And again.

Then he decides he wants to die, or call the Emergency number (118). This is where things get interesting. He tells them it is not life-threatening but he doesn't know what to do (I am in bed by this time, but keeping alert all the same, resting up for what will surely be a busier day for me than for him). They take the info and say a doctor will call him back.

The doctor calls back in about ten minutes. He tells his story. The doctor says it sounds like the virus that has been going around and hit a peak last month. He asks if he can get to a pharmacy. Sweetie says no since he's erupting at both ends and the daughter is sleeping so having wifey go out is impossible.

So, get this, the doctor comes to our house.

Yes, at 5am. He shows up, talks to husband and gives him a shot in the rump. And like that he feels better, or at least he stops erupting. He goes back to bed and wakes up the next day at about 11.

Amazing. A house call. I thought they only had those on Little House on the Prairie!!

Basketball in English for the Wee Ones

Heads up!

If your little person was born in 2008, 2009, or 2010 you can send them for a double whammy of Basketball & English at the same time!

Dates: May 9, 16, 23, 30 and June 6 from 4.30-5.30

Palestra di Chiadino
Via dei mille 18- Trieste

info@futurosa.it

What do Wine and Non-Profit Language Schools have in Common?

I went to Vinitaly for the first time this year for a consulting job. I got back last night. What an experience.

It made me think a lot about the wine business and what it has in common with what we are doing at the Italian American Association (I know this seems like a stretch, just give me a second to develop the thought).

A couple of years ago, after a project working with Michelin-starred chefs in Dubai (of all places), I came back to my role at the Association with a renewed sense of purpose. Hanging out with people at the highest levels of Food & Bev can do that to you. They have such a different approach to the things we do every day (eat & drink) that you can't help but be inspired by them.

They are artists, poets, philosophers. They talk to the food, they hear the voices of the grapes, in short, they are two steps away from Wacko. But that is what makes them so special. They hear the voices and they Honor them. We get to high-five the angels through their good works.

You would be crazy not to want to apply that to whatever the heck it is you do in life.

So I decided it was high time we concentrated on the Experience we were offering our students and members, and their families, too. I was set on creating a Michelin-starred language school.

Step one. New toilet seats. You can't have a Michelin-level school without new toilet seats. That was a no-brainer.

Done. Then came the intangibles.

We had to focus on creating a top-notch quality environment for our teachers and volunteers. Our mindset changed. We wanted to create a Professional Environment our people would be proud to work in. It turned out to be easier than anticipated. It quickly became a sort of group decision. We had to all agree on it for it to work, actually. We started to see that we were part of something Bigger than ourselves-- something that hadn't been done yet in Trieste.

Our internal team of teachers are Libero Professionisti with a VAT number. You can say what you want, but for those of us who have done it, we know that when you open up your own (albeit small) business, you are defining yourself as a professional. That, and you come face-to-face with the reality that you have to be great at what you do if you want to survive and eventually thrive. That gave us an even greater impetus to succeed.

Choosing the best teachers is important. Keeping them, even more so. Quality and consistency are the value we offer our students. We started to collaborate more, have teachers co-teach, develop materials together, go on the road to present at teaching conferences here and abroad. We concentrated on learning, and giving the best of the best and not worrying about what money was coming in. Leave the fixation on profit to the for-profit schools. We wanted no part of that.

Fast forward a couple of years. Vinitaly. I am working with producers of Verdicchio di Matelica in the Marche region. I am talking to the President of their Consortium of Producers. It was like talking to one of my colleagues. It's like, this guy totally Gets It. 

1. Identify with your product. I am my wine (Association). 
2. Quality =  Respect. 
3. If you have a quality product, the money will follow. 

Over the last five years we have increased our number of students by 400% without sacrificing the quality of what we do. In fact, most of them come back year after year. The money was not our focus and yet it came anyway.

Could it be that our Association has more in common with producers of fine wines, than with other language schools?

Hallelujah everyone!!

Amen.

What is up with appreciating the season????

I have a couple of questions burning a hole in my pocket today.

1. Does anyone get USED to the Bora, like, Ever?

Just wondering. You know, curiosity.

2. Why don't people go somewhere hot in Winter?

That's what I don't get. In America, we like to go where it's HOT in Winter (Florida, Caribbean) and cold in the Summer (Alaska).

Here, they do the whole embrace the season thing. In summer, they go swimming (whaaa??) and holiday in hot places (Trieste for a staycation, Croatia, South of Italy), and in Winter they do things like wear snow pants and go skiing in the mountains and snowshoeing and things.

Like, what is UP with these people?!?

Having fun is just too EASY here. It should be more of a sacrifice, we should suffer more.

Don't you think? Help me out. This is almost as bad as eating food IN SEASON. Another thing the Italians just don't get.

Everyone knows prime season for Strawberries is in Frosty February. Can I get a witness?

Someone, please tell them.

Send the Kids Skiing!

There seems to be a stark contrast between parenting styles in Trieste.

On the one hand, there are the mothers who see themselves as combat soldiers in a constant struggle to defend their children against their tyrannical teachers who assign too much homework, and the schools that provide inadequately delicious food to fuel their children. They monitor their children's time, schedule them abundant play time so they can be children. They vow to never let their children ride the bus unaccompanied by an adult until at least 3rd year of Middle School and are the administrators of the parents' whatsapp group.

Then there's our group of parents from Little Sweety's first grade class. Case in point.

We get a little flyer one day about a ski class for the kids. Five saturdays from 6:30am to 6:30pm. Not much more info on the sheet than that, which is an invitation to call. So we did. And the information was the total price, and how to participate.

Simple:
1. Drop your kids off (with the skis they rent or buy ahead of time)  in a big parking lot at 6:30a.m.
2. Fetch them at the end of the day.
3. If you give them 6 euros they can eat lunch.
4. Bus costs 12 euros total for one day.

No info on what they are supposed to bring, or what to wear (I have skiied twice in my life. Not an expert).
No form to fill out (oh yeah, we'll do that next week), no emergency numbers for any Just in Case situations. No possibility to pay (hah?) before the kids go to their first lesson, our babies, without us for a whole day.

Saturday morning the kids, who are a little nervous, hop on a giant bus with Slovenian licence plates that is (hopefully) heading to a place in Italy where people ski two hours away.

And all of this seems, like, Fine, at the moment of drop off.

And, frankly, ALL DAY as I got more stuff done than I can remember in recent history on a Saturday. Time flies, in fact, and since 6-year-olds don't have phones, we don't really have any updates, so it goes even faster!

The lady on the phone said they would be back between 6:15 and 6:30p.m..

It is 6:15 on the dot and we are waiting with the other parents in the parking lot. We exchange comments like Is this normal? Who are these people again? Do we have a phone number for them? Do they have ours?

I start to wonder if the over-protective mom-squad was right. What if they don't come back. What have I done.

Then, at 6:29 the bus rolls in, the kids get off, they are happy and bursting with energy. They see a patch of ice and immediately go and try to make snow balls out of it (we live in Italy, remember) and throw them at each other. The chaperones are cool as cucumbers. They say the kids were good. They mostly listened, only a couple of them got lost, but then they found them, so, yeah, it was a good day.

But... can we pay?
Well, we are really tired now, how about next week?

Awesome. Can't wait for next Saturday!

How to Have a Vegan Over for Dinner

Tired of your busy social life and want a break from all of those dinner invitations? I have two solutions.

1. Have a kid.
2. Tell your friends and family you are following a Vegan diet.

I know what I am talking about. Believe me!

Number 1 makes you temporarily Untouchable until your friends either embrace the Lunch thing or you find other people with kids to hang out with. Don't fret: that will happen at three years old when little Sweetie goes to scuola materna. 

Number 2 is more difficult to navigate. At first I thought this was only the case for self-righteous pains in the arses who are judgy and annoying. But, actually, it turns out to be the case even for those of us who are perfectly charming, easy-to-please, non-judgemental, wonderful people!

When I was just merely vegetarian, see, people treated me with fascination and slight pity. What do I eat if I don't eat meat? How do I get my protein (news flash, a POTATO has enough protein for a day, people, and it is not particularly protein rich, just saying.)? Wouldn't I just die for a nice steak? (No. A can of tuna, yes). It must be so complicated not eating meat, but at least you have fish. No fish either? Wow. Can't imagine that. Well, I am cutting down, too. Hardly eat red meat anymore. Mostly chicken, cold cuts, that sort of thing... To the meat eaters I didn't pose much of a threat, especially since my not partaking left more tartara for them...

My mother-in-law still has a hard time with the concept. She asked me nearly every week for six years if I was Still a Vegetarian. For her, my diet choices were problematic. She felt it was her responsability to offer another option and sometimes that pressure was overwhelming. Until I pointed out that I could just eat everything except the meat. Her solution was to provide large quantities of Cheeses and egg products to make up for the lack of meat. To her that made sense.

Then I cut out dairy and eggs.

That was when MY life got better, but those around me got WORSE.

Oh, being a Veggie wasn't bad enough?! What did we do to deserve THIS?!? (Did I tell you Triestini have a tendency to take things personally?)

Let me offer two solutions from the Vegan perspective. We are not as different as you think.

On my plate, the Starch is the star. I do not care about carbohydrate issues. I eat as many of them as I want, and at any time of day (nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah!)

Just put POTATOES, BEANS, LENTILS, RICE, OR PASTA in the area where YOU would normally put a hunk of meat.

For everything else, you and me, we are cool. I eat the veggies and the salad just like you do.

See? It's not so hard.

I am even happy to bring a dish to pass so you can try something yummy and new, too. Just ask!

Ok? Are we clear? Can we have supper together sometime again? Because I miss our little talks. And Red Wine is vegan, my friend. Another thing we have in common!

Planning a Family Reunion

My family lives in about 7 states total. We, like many other American families, do not see each other very often. Every few years, however, we make a plan to come together and party like nobody's business. Normally the meeting place is near the home of one of the ELDERS. My mom's house, or my Aunt and Uncle's place. Makes sense-- the Boomers have space and money, the salt and pepper of a good party. This year we changed the rules. Well, actually, it was about 3 years ago, which was when we started to plan our European reunion in Trieste for this summer in June. In the end there were about 23 of us in Trieste, we worked it all out, and we had an awesome time. Since a couple of people have asked how we managed to do it, here are some guidelines in case you would like to do something similar.

1. Start planning 3 years in advance. This gives everyone time to save up, get off work, get a passport or renew their old one, and mentally prepare.

2. Plan for 3 days with one BIG party on one of them. We make our Big Party on Fathers' Day because in the US it always falls on a Sunday in June. That is the day that all guests MUST be in town. This gives people wiggle room to make their plans and get a good deal on plane tickets.

3. Unless you live in a place like Rome, Venice, or Florence, don't count on everyone wanting to stay in your town just because you live there. Some members of my family got their tourism out of the way before coming to Trieste, others started here and went off to other places they hadn't seen yet after recovering from our party. Trieste is a great home base for trips to Venice, Rome, Slovenia, etc. Ryan air flies out of Trieste and Treviso, too. Easy jet flies out of Venice.

4. Lodging. Help your guests by giving them different options as to where to stay. Hotels always have airconditioning, which Americans appreciate when it is hot as a mofo in Trieste. I had people sleeping at friends' places, my house, in a residence (hotel where they clean once a week) and at a hotel. Everyone was happy. You provide the resources, they make their own plans. I think that works best. Put people close to busses so they can be self-sufficient. Everyone stayed downtown, so that made transportation easy, too.

5. Activities: We planned a series of things to do that people could opt to participate in... or not. We made everything we could Kid Friendly. 

Guided walking Tour of Trieste
Family Italian language class
Treasure hunt at the farmers' market
Cooking class
Dinner made by family with chef Federico
The Big Party

6. Transportation. Trieste is largely a walking city and my people stayed downtown. Those who did not were within feet of a city bus stop. There are also taxis and my family used those too. When we went up to the Carso to our party, we rented a bus to take 20 people and the other handful went in cars. If you want to rent a bus, try just over the border in Slovenia,  and there are places in Trieste, too. Be careful, though, weekends are much harder to plan in the summer because of all of the other little day trips people organize. The train is always a good idea and kids love them. They key is putting people in a position to be autonomous.

7. The Party. Finding the appropriate venue is not easy in Europe, especially if your group is big. We opted to go up to carso and have our party at a wine-producer that also has the Best Osmizza in the world. We worked out a price per person ahead-of-time and a menu. They gave us a great deal. My family drank A LOT of wine, so we threw more money in over the course of the evening.

Final thoughts.

8. You never know who is going to come. We had some last minute confirmations, and other people didn't come who we thought for sure would. No biggy. Do not take these things personally. Love the ones you're with.

9. Let your guests be part of the plan. You can give them information and guide them, but, ultimately, the success of the shabang is up to everyone, and that takes the pressure off.

10. Don't forget the family portrait. They are dippy as hell, but you just HAVE to. Our uniform this year was the Italy soccer shirt. I found them on sale at Lidl for cheap cheap cheap and bought one for each person, including the Italian components taking part in our reunion. They made for an awesome picture and a rocking souvenir!

11. Create a closed Facebook page of your event. This helps people get psyched up and becomes an online journal of everyone's trip. Afterwards people share their photos and videos here. I still go back to ours and look at it sometimes and remember how much fun we had.

12. Other Communication. Important info should be shared on Facebook and email for those who don't DO Facebook, especially in the time leading up to the reunion. In Trieste you don't always have wifi, so your family should know that you can also make meeting times and places just like in the olden days. Europeans use Whatsapp much more than imessage, by the way. Some of the family members NEVER communicated directly, but that was okay because there is usually a spokesperson in each family that just naturally speaks on behalf of the others.

13. Home Base. We used the Italian American Association as a home base, since it is centrally located, there is wi-fi, a bar downstairs, and I was often there.

Conclusion: Keep your plans flexible, give people options, make sure there is plenty of wine, and you can't go wrong when you are planning your next reunion!

HAVE FUN!

Great News in 2017 for us BUS PEOPLE

Exciting news from Trieste Trasporti. The price of an individual ticket has actually GONE DOWN, which is the first time in the History of the World that I have seen this happen (or at least in the last 13 years I have been living in Trieste. Once it stayed the same for two years, but this decrease is a first). The price will go down from 1.35 for an individual ticket (60minutes) to 1.25.

Second bit of news: Kids ride free with a valid ticket-holding adult up to the age of 10! Kids shorter than 1 meter (you measure this when you get on the bus at the front. There is a line there marked one meter) are always free.

The difference this year is that kids taller than one meter need to show a special I.D. card issued by Trieste Trasporti proving the age of the child. You can do this online for 5 euros, but if you go directly to the office and do it, it's free. I did not take the bus with my sweetie every day, but over the course of 2016 we still managed to spend 199.80 on Bus Tickets for my 6-year old. Yes, I keep track of these things (so you don't have to).

The price of year-long bus passes also stays the same this year. If you buy it online there is a 5% discount. You can pay with a credit card or, if you have an Italian bank with online banking, you can choose the "My Bank" option, insert the name of your bank and do it through home banking. That is what I just did. It cost me  euro 326.33. I then request an invoice and send that over to my accountant and part of it gets written off.

Just wanted you to know!

FYI UPDATE FOR 2018. KIDS STILL GO FREE IF UNDER 10 AND TRAVELLING WITH AN ADULT. THEY MUST HAVE THE SPECIAL I.D. CARD.