Want to Feel Rich? Come to my place!!

My most popular blog posts are about living frugally and saving money the Triestino way. This time I want to turn things around to talk about the things that drain our bank accounts in America. They came to mind as I read the article in the Atlantic this month called the Secret Shame of the Middle Class.

Note that it refers to the MIDDLE CLASS, not the poor. And that is what I find so interesting-- how far the Middle Class will go to appear wealthy.

Among the bombshells of the article was the revelation that 47% of Americans would not have $400 cash in the event of an emergency. Second revelation: 67% of Americans would not be able to come up with $2,000 even if they had a month to do it. Well, they could, but they would probably have to sell some combination of internal organs to do it. So even with the popularity of Financial gurus like Suze Orman, we Americans just can't seem to up our financial literacy game.  

The writer  counts himself as the typical financially illiterate American who is in lousy financial shape and constantly trying to hide it from his acquaintances and even his own family (until now). He explains how it happened that a smart, educated, reasonable guy got himself so overrun with debt that he and his wife had to ask their grown children on occasion to help them pay for heating when the oil ran out.

I kept thinking... Can he hear himself? The justifications for his financial disaster came in this self-righteous tone: "Well, maybe I could have done things differently, but excuuuuuse me for choosing a career I love that pays eratically AND wanting my kids to have a good education AND wanting to pay for my kids' wedding AND wanting to live in the Hamptons!"  

Basically, here is what it comes down to. The game is to appear wealthy. Here is how!

1. Pay for your Childrens' education. School must be expensive and elite to give them the networking possibilities required to jump into a higher social class (inshalla). It starts with private elementary schools and takes them all the way up to ivy league colleges and universities.

2. Live in the most expensive neighbourhood you can afford in the biggest house you can possibly afford (while times are good). If you are not putting your kids in private schools, then public schools are funded by property taxes. The higher the property value, the higher the taxes, and the better the school. Also, you want your kids in contact with the "right" kids.

3. Pay for your kids' enormous weddings, after all, it's your little Princess's Special Day! Put it all on your credit card.

And remember this very important Underlying Assumption which will help you justify spending more than you make. Say it with me:

"I will make more money next year than this year, so I will pay off the debt fast."


Another way you can appear and feel rich is to come and visit ME in ITALY. Here are the comments I regularly get from my American visitors which make them feel GREAT (and make me feel like a total loser)!

1. You live in an APARTMENT????!!!
2. Everything here is so LITTLE and CUTE!
3. Now would you call this a CONDO or an Apartment? Did you actually take a LOAN out to buy THIS PLACE?
4. OMG! You only have ONE car?? How can you LIVE?! It's a STATION WAGON? I can't believe they still make those!! Gosh, reminds me of the 70s!!
5. Your Fridge is so TINY!! It's like Gulliver lives here!
6. Wow! Is that an iPhone 4? Haven't seen one of those since about 2014! My iphone 6  comes free with my $150/month plan and it takes SUCH GOOD pictures. I read books on it, too.
7. What?? They don't have free wifi here, like EVERYWHERE??

There you have it.
I wish I had a new phone.