The Wild Asparagus Eye

Spring has sprung, friends. You know what that means, Doncha?

Wild asparagus hunting, you say?

Right on! Well done, you are now a Triestino.

"The conditions were just right this year," they say at the water cooler  coffee machine at the office. "Rain rain rain, sun sun sun! Just wait 'til this weekend! We are going to canvas the Carso!!"

There is a secret language and word-of-mouth-only culture surrounding wild asparagus that only the locals speak. It involves things like "recognising the right bush" and "getting there before anyone else" and having "the eye" for wild asparagus.

Monday morning break-time (which is actually the first half hour of work, between 9:00 and 9:30am) usually involves fisherman-type boasts about how "big the bunch" was from the weekend, and new secret spots discovered.

Now, I do not speak this language, and I definitely do not have THE EYE. But. I can tell you that my family went this weekend (I had to work and they decided to have fun without me) with some experts (Little Sweetie's classmates and their parents). They came home with a nice bouquet of wild asparagus (which is thin thin thin, by the way, and can be mixed up with just about any other weed in the Carso if you ask me) and a handful of ticks burrowed sweetly under Sweetie's skin (belly button, butt, shoulder-blade), but no pain no gain when it comes to Asparagus Hunting. These are small inconveniences compared to the delight of a nice frittata with wild asparagus and a spritz bianco at the end of the Asparagus Expedition...

But, can I just say something? My advice to you. The Asparagus is delicious, but the hunting seems like a lot of work. Do like I do: skip the hunting and cultivate your friendships. Asparagus Hunters are wonderful and generous people. If you are nice to them maybe they will share with you. The asparagus, I mean. For the secret locations, good luck!

Ask the Diavolo

A very stupid question I ask people when I get to know them is what their favorite pizza is. This is because I am almost always hungry and asking it gives me a good excuse to think about food.

In Italy you get a menu of about 80 varieties (give or take), which is a lot more choice than we normally have in the States, mainly because we order one big pizza and we share it. You only have so much freedom of choice when you have to negotiate with four or five different people (who almost always have strong opinions on the matter).

So this weekend I asked my students one by one what their favorite pizza was. Along with thinking about food, I am also interested in how people make decisions when there are lots of choices. I ask, and then I immediately judge them.

1. Do they decide by not deciding and always get the same?

If it's a Margarita, they are:
a. Under 10,
b. Picky eaters,
c. always on a diet,
d. risk averse
e. all the above

If it's a 4 formaggi they are:
a. Over 30
b. Like strong flavors
c. Have taken risks in the past but are finished with that now
d. are completely aware that their pizza is disastrous for their health but they "deserve" it because they work so hard.

2. Do they get the same pizza for a certain period of time and then move on to a different one?
This person also probably:

a. Reads every book by the same author before moving on to a new one
b. Is a fan of concept albums
c. Wears team colors the day their team plays
d. Is not afraid of commitment, but appreciates variety.


3. Do they purposefully get a different pizza each time?
That could mean he/she is:

a. a Risk taker
b. Respects processes
c. Loves food.
d. Gets bored easily.

4. Do they have the Pizzaiolo decide?
This person is:

a. adventurous
b. a show off
c. non-judgemental
d. has low expectations and therefore is always happy

So that's what I've got on my mind when this one girl says:

"I just love a pepperoni pizza!"

and I am like, "You would love America then, because that is one of the three pizzas that people can normally agree on."

1. Cheese pizza


2. Cheese & Sausage pizza


3. Cheese & Pepperoni pizza


But then the ex-pat in me kicked into gear and I got suspicious.

See, this girl didn't REALLY like pepperoni pizza, because, if she did, she would have said something like:

"I really love, but I don't know how you say in English, the DIAVOLA pizza. How you say... Devil Pizza?"

Because a Diavola is a cheese and pepperoni pizza (they call the pepperoni Piccante, but if that is hot for you, then, well, I probably won't invite you to my house for dinner, like ever).

So I'm like "You mean a PEPPERONI PIZZA?" and I google up an image of a DIAVOLA pizza and she's like:

NO NO NO!! NOT THAT! I MEAN THAT I REALLY LOVE PEPPERONI!

So then I have to come up with a good Equivalent in English. But there isn't one because who the hell likes Bell Peppers on their pizza?! Nobody!! Except for maybe some kook who gets the veggie pizza and they happen to throw some Green Peppers on it (which is the nastiest of the triplets, as sweet-tasting Red and Yellow Bell Peppers are nummy but completely out of place on a pizza).

Then she clarifies. "Yes, I love this pizza because the Peppers are FRIED."

And I think about it, and I want to be empathic and so I say, "Yeah, I guess I can see that, just about EVERYTHING tastes good FRIED."

And I do believe that when I say it. But then the conversation opens up and another guy (orders same pizza for 2-3 months then moves on to the next pizza) says

"If Pepperoni is Pepper, and Salamino piccante is Pepperoni, then how you say Salame?

which opens up a conundrum

Because then I'm like well there's a word called Salami, but I don't know if that is specific or if it's more like Summer Sausage.

Wait, says he. Summer sausage? You mean your cold cuts have seasons?

No, say I. I think Summer Sausage is more like you Friulani slice up and eat with polenta, and I google a picture of Summer Sausage and the class looks at me confused before Margarita girl says:

Let's just say Summer Sausage is meats in general, shall we?

What the hell do I care? I'm a vegetarian. If it's okay with the Italians, it's ok with me.

Cooking with Fire

I guess it's the viking in me but ever since I moved into our new house, I can't get enough of making fires and cooking in them!

Some things go directly on the burning embers of the fire (and you don't have to wait for summer!):

Roasted Red, Yellow, and Green Peppers 
15 minutes total, flip halfway, throw them into a plastic bag for 10 minutes, then take the skin off and put them in Olive Oil, Garlic and Parsely and serve. Yummers!

Eggplant 
30 minutes total, flip halfway. When it's black and mushy, take it out and let it sit in tin foil for 10 minutes, then cut it open lengthwise and scoop it out. Take the innerds and mix with mayo and you've got a nice spread for crackers or a dip for raw veggies or chips. You can also find a recipe for baba ganouche (tahini, lemon juice, water, etc).

Leeks
Roughly 15 minutes or until charred. Slice lengthwise and scoop out the insides. You can do lots of fun things. Mix with cream cheese for a yummy dip, throw in a pot with water and make a yummy soup (add potatoes for a thicker consistency).

I go nuts for the smokey flavor you get from cooking right on the fire. You can also do the campfire thing and put your veggies with a little salt and pepper and olive oil in tin foil and throw them on the fire, too.

For more info, just google the above. I am no expert, so have fun experimenting and check with the real chefs on Google for the rest...

Yum yum yum!