Ask the Diavolo

A very stupid question I ask people when I get to know them is what their favorite pizza is. This is because I am almost always hungry and asking it gives me a good excuse to think about food.

In Italy you get a menu of about 80 varieties (give or take), which is a lot more choice than we normally have in the States, mainly because we order one big pizza and we share it. You only have so much freedom of choice when you have to negotiate with four or five different people (who almost always have strong opinions on the matter).

So this weekend I asked my students one by one what their favorite pizza was. Along with thinking about food, I am also interested in how people make decisions when there are lots of choices. I ask, and then I immediately judge them.

1. Do they decide by not deciding and always get the same?

If it's a Margarita, they are:
a. Under 10,
b. Picky eaters,
c. always on a diet,
d. risk averse
e. all the above

If it's a 4 formaggi they are:
a. Over 30
b. Like strong flavors
c. Have taken risks in the past but are finished with that now
d. are completely aware that their pizza is disastrous for their health but they "deserve" it because they work so hard.

2. Do they get the same pizza for a certain period of time and then move on to a different one?
This person also probably:

a. Reads every book by the same author before moving on to a new one
b. Is a fan of concept albums
c. Wears team colors the day their team plays
d. Is not afraid of commitment, but appreciates variety.


3. Do they purposefully get a different pizza each time?
That could mean he/she is:

a. a Risk taker
b. Respects processes
c. Loves food.
d. Gets bored easily.

4. Do they have the Pizzaiolo decide?
This person is:

a. adventurous
b. a show off
c. non-judgemental
d. has low expectations and therefore is always happy

So that's what I've got on my mind when this one girl says:

"I just love a pepperoni pizza!"

and I am like, "You would love America then, because that is one of the three pizzas that people can normally agree on."

1. Cheese pizza


2. Cheese & Sausage pizza


3. Cheese & Pepperoni pizza


But then the ex-pat in me kicked into gear and I got suspicious.

See, this girl didn't REALLY like pepperoni pizza, because, if she did, she would have said something like:

"I really love, but I don't know how you say in English, the DIAVOLA pizza. How you say... Devil Pizza?"

Because a Diavola is a cheese and pepperoni pizza (they call the pepperoni Piccante, but if that is hot for you, then, well, I probably won't invite you to my house for dinner, like ever).

So I'm like "You mean a PEPPERONI PIZZA?" and I google up an image of a DIAVOLA pizza and she's like:

NO NO NO!! NOT THAT! I MEAN THAT I REALLY LOVE PEPPERONI!

So then I have to come up with a good Equivalent in English. But there isn't one because who the hell likes Bell Peppers on their pizza?! Nobody!! Except for maybe some kook who gets the veggie pizza and they happen to throw some Green Peppers on it (which is the nastiest of the triplets, as sweet-tasting Red and Yellow Bell Peppers are nummy but completely out of place on a pizza).

Then she clarifies. "Yes, I love this pizza because the Peppers are FRIED."

And I think about it, and I want to be empathic and so I say, "Yeah, I guess I can see that, just about EVERYTHING tastes good FRIED."

And I do believe that when I say it. But then the conversation opens up and another guy (orders same pizza for 2-3 months then moves on to the next pizza) says

"If Pepperoni is Pepper, and Salamino piccante is Pepperoni, then how you say Salame?

which opens up a conundrum

Because then I'm like well there's a word called Salami, but I don't know if that is specific or if it's more like Summer Sausage.

Wait, says he. Summer sausage? You mean your cold cuts have seasons?

No, say I. I think Summer Sausage is more like you Friulani slice up and eat with polenta, and I google a picture of Summer Sausage and the class looks at me confused before Margarita girl says:

Let's just say Summer Sausage is meats in general, shall we?

What the hell do I care? I'm a vegetarian. If it's okay with the Italians, it's ok with me.

Welcome to Home Ownership: Frozen Pipes!

So... perfect timing! I go running this morning, come back all proud of myself, then wake up little Sweetie, who, like a good Italian person, has learned how to make coffee with the Moka and is all jazzed about making Breakfast for Mommy and Daddy, and it is she who discovers there is NO WATER.

Yes. Frozen pipes!

So I guess that cover that's missing where those water pipes enter the house had a raison d'etre after all! We'll have to get on that. In the meantime, hair dryer (yes, we actually have one, for guests only usually) plus extension cord and within seven minutes the Moka was on the stove and ready to rock.

The day was saved and I got my coffee. Phyoo!

Running with the Bora

I am very pleased with myself for braving the cold this morning and running with the Bora on the bike path. She ran ahead of me at times, and definitely against me on the way back down, but overall she behaved herself and it wasn't so bad. I mean it was, but now it's over so it doesn't matter so much. Yeah!

Jack Frost Came!

There are advantages to living mid-way up the impossible hill here in Ricmanje (municipality of San Dorligo): less Bora (woo hoo!) and higher chance of Frost. In fact, the view out my window today is white, to be sure. I don't have a car, so I can celebrate whole-heartedly with the certainty that slippery streets are NOT MY PROBLEM!!

Enjoy your day and bundle up!!

The Bora: A Beginner's Guide

Before you go out and get that Alabarda tattoo on your ankle and declare yourself an official Triestine convert, behold, The Bora. For She, my friends, is part of the package. If you have never met, she is the Siberian wind that slaps around even the toughest Triestini.

Fun facts:

They say the Bora blows for an odd number of days. I can verify that for as long as I have been counting it is true.

If you ask children in Trieste what scares them most, many of them will say the Bora.

Triestini say the Bora "cleans" the water of the Adriatic so it is "good." I think it just helps move the ice cream cup pollution out of sight of Piazza Unità.

The Bora makes animals act so weird they even made an adjective about it.

The Bora relishes every opportunity to be disagreeable in the absolute worst ways. Let's just say she is a grumpy ass Ho. Here are some examples of her nastiness.

The Bora will:

1. Kill your umbrella, and she does not care that it was a Totes.
2. She will knock down that row of Scooters like dominoes making sure yours is somewhere in the middle.
3. Then she will blow a big dumpster down the street and right into your car.
4. She still has time to steal your clothes off the line (because you live in Trieste and of course you don't have a dryer) and leave them down the block.
5. And just when you think you are safe, she will chill your ass right down to the bone and it doesn't matter how many and what coats you wear.

Oh, what? You're a vegan? The Bora laughs her Siberian Belly Laugh. She will have you wearing fur before the end of March... Suckas!!!

Make no mistake. The Bora sucks, and blows, at the same time.

Cooking with Fire

I guess it's the viking in me but ever since I moved into our new house, I can't get enough of making fires and cooking in them!

Some things go directly on the burning embers of the fire (and you don't have to wait for summer!):

Roasted Red, Yellow, and Green Peppers 
15 minutes total, flip halfway, throw them into a plastic bag for 10 minutes, then take the skin off and put them in Olive Oil, Garlic and Parsely and serve. Yummers!

Eggplant 
30 minutes total, flip halfway. When it's black and mushy, take it out and let it sit in tin foil for 10 minutes, then cut it open lengthwise and scoop it out. Take the innerds and mix with mayo and you've got a nice spread for crackers or a dip for raw veggies or chips. You can also find a recipe for baba ganouche (tahini, lemon juice, water, etc).

Leeks
Roughly 15 minutes or until charred. Slice lengthwise and scoop out the insides. You can do lots of fun things. Mix with cream cheese for a yummy dip, throw in a pot with water and make a yummy soup (add potatoes for a thicker consistency).

I go nuts for the smokey flavor you get from cooking right on the fire. You can also do the campfire thing and put your veggies with a little salt and pepper and olive oil in tin foil and throw them on the fire, too.

For more info, just google the above. I am no expert, so have fun experimenting and check with the real chefs on Google for the rest...

Yum yum yum!

The Triestine Treasure Hunt Challenge

Looking for something to do today? How about a good old-fashioned Treasure Hunt Tour of Trieste? The first person to complete all tasks wins a delicious Spritz Bianco (with ice and lemon) courtesy of Life in Trieste.

Good luck, and NO CHEATING!

1. The Giant Mortadella (Don't call it Baloney, but that's what it really is) at Da Giovanni's in Via San Lazaro. Have you seen it? Enormous. Troubling.

Your task:
Eat a full slice. Wash it down with a Spritz Bianco.  Take a selfie for proof.

2. The covered market in Largo Barriera.

Your task:
Buy some "Ravanei." Just keep asking until you find a stand that has them. You get extra credit if you pull this one off at the Mercato all'ingrosso.

3. The blue lights in Piazza Unità that signal where the water used to be before they filled it all in.

Your task:
Get a picture of the Piazza "By Night". Explain to me in two paragraphs or less what the hell they were thinking when they planned that.

4. The Card Catalogue at the Italian American Association (Piazza Sant'Antonio, 6).

Your task:
Take a picture of a check out card for a book that was checked out at least five times.


5. The American flag on the painting in the Comune room where the voting happens.

Your task:
Get a selfie with it.

Give Yourself Your Own Damn Raise!

A couple of weeks ago I was talking to a colleague, who is a moderate smoker, about how we spend money. He said: "If I could just quit smoking, it would be like having a 60-euro raise each month." Now, to Americans that may not seem like a lot of money, but here in Italy, raises are pretty hard to come by (the negative trade-off to having the security of such things as lifetime contracts, I suppose). It is still 720 euros more in your pocket per year.

It got me to thinking about the concept of giving yourself a raise. Why wait for your boss to notice you? Do it yourself. Better yet, reduce your expenses so much that after a few years you won't even have to work that much to cover them! Now that is empowerment, people!

If you're not sure how you can give yourself a raise, I have listed some of the items that we DON'T spend money on at my house. The shock is how much it adds up to! It made me think about how easy it is for my friends who make much more money than I do to live from paycheck to paycheck even though they are high earners.

Note: the Give Yourself A Raise concept is not for everyone.

Especially if you say to yourself, "I work so hard, I DESERVE to spend money on __________" or "Saving money is cool, but I want to have a LIFE..."

Rather, a compatible mindset would say "I work so hard, it's a pity to throw money away on ________  when what I really want to do is _____________."

Pick and choose what works for you. Here are some of the expenses that my friends and colleagues spend money on that I choose not to.

1. A second car.
Gas alone: 150

2. Apperitivi with friends during the week.
Savings: 80

3. Coffee and brioche at the bar (weekday breakfast).
Savings: 80

4. Lunch out or in the mensa.
Savings: 240

5. Yoga at the gym.
Savings: 40

6. Newspaper/magazines.
Savings: 40

7. Cigarettes.
Savings: 100

8. Massages.
Savings: 100

9. Meat.
Savings: 100

10. Manicures
Savings: 100

11. Estetista (hair removal, I believe-- these places are a mystery to me)
Savings: 100

12. Hairdresser (I may go once a year, otherwise I cut my own):
Savings: 100

13. Cable tv
Savings: 45

Total Savings: 1175

There are probably other things you may be spending your money on, too. If they are important to you, keep them. If not, simplify and live richer. It's the Triestine way.